Falling Here Sesshin

A few weeks ago we had our February Hybrid Sesshin, with people from far away joining the Temple sesshin residents on Zoom for a lovely weekend of serious Zen practice and play.  Our theme was a koan about Layman Pang and his famous saying, "Beautiful snowflakes!  They don't fall anywhere else!"  Back in February, we were starved for snow in Worcester, and now we've had one big storm to be followed this weekend by another.   It's deeply true that everything that happens, good, bad or neutral, is simply what is happening.  Nothing happens anywhere else!

 

Leaving the SZBA

 

About a month ago, I resigned from the Soto Zen Buddhist Association, a group of ordained Soto Zen priests.  My letter of resignation, which follows at the end of this post, is self-explanatory.  I noticed that as soon as I pressed send on the email, I felt an enormous sense of relief.  My ordination is in two Soto Zen lineages, and in Boundless Way Zen, we have found a way to be priests that matches my deepest sense of what it means to commit whole-heartedly to the Great Way of Zen.  Our style has drifted away from the SZBA style in many respects, especially in our training, which we feel is more strict and also more spacious than what is now expected by the SZBA.  Here is a section from the Boundless Way Zen Temple website which describes our understanding of what it means to be a Zen priest.  Please scroll down to the section called "ordination" for more details: https://worcesterzen.org/authorization-transmission-ordination/#ordination.  And here is the first paragraph of that section:

"Priests vow to manifest the life of the sangha. Ordination is a commitment not only to Zen and Buddhism, but also to our particular manifestation of the Path within the Boundless Way Zen sangha. This means taking on tasks of support and leadership that can range from shoveling snow at the Temple to being a member of the Leadership Council, from leading a sitting group to being a chaplain in the larger community. An unsui (clouds-and-water) priest may perform all the rites of the Boundless Way, including performing marriages and conducting funerals. An unsui priest may also serve in the larger community in a variety of ministerial capacities."  

I end this post with the letter that I sent explaining my resignation, written and submitted together with my teacher James Ford and one of my students, David Caruso: 

All of us who have signed below have had misgivings about our place within the Soto Zen Buddhist Association for a number of years. Beyond a nostalgic sense of identity with the historic Soto transmission and fondness for many individuals involved, we do not see an alignment with either the larger vision of the organization, nor its expectations for membership. 

Triggered by the recent suspension of a member, we began discussing our relationship with the SZBA, and why we remain members. Each of us have different feelings about it, but we come to the same basic conclusion.

Our lack of alignment stems from our perception of an expanding list of expectations starting with formation requirements which we do not expect from our students, and extending to what are considered ethical violations that seem at once both overly broad and randomly specific.   After consulting with our formal and informal dharma family, we have come to the conclusion that it is time to leave.

Please accept this as our formal resignation from membership within the Soto Zen Buddhist Association.

Rev. James Myōun Ford, Empty Moon Zen

Rev. Melissa Myōzen Blacker, Boundless Way Zen Temple

Rev. David Shunyo Caruso, Boundless Way Zen Temple

Sweeping the Path Sesshin

Some of the attendees at the January Sesshin

Our first sesshin of 2023 was completely online thanks to the magic of Zoom, and we will continue to have sesshin this year almost monthly: some on Zoom, some hybrid (on Zoom and at the Temple) and some at the Temple only. Our sesshin schedule is here: 2023 sesshin dates and information

David Rōshi was still recovering from his pre-Christmas car accident, but I was ready to teach after the trauma of his accident and my brother's unexpected death began to fade a bit for me and was ably partnered in teaching with Dharma Holder Alan Richardson, assisted by Dharma Holder Michael Herzog. David came in and out, and had the energy to give a brief encouragement talk on the last night.

Our theme for this sesshin was Case 21 from The Book of Serenity collection: Yunyan Sweeps the Grounds, focusing on what it means to be busy. It was a rich and deep time for all. Our next sesshin is a hybrid one, from February 10 -- 13, and will hopefully be taught by David and me, with assistance from Dharma Holder Michael. There are still a couple of in person places left, and an infinite number of online places. If you're not too busy with your own sweeping, you might consider signing up!

Healing and Receiving

 

About two months ago, I fell from a high stool, and landed on the back of my head, smashed into a cast-iron radiator.  A visit to the emergency room was a journey through grace -- so many people, including a sangha member who is an EMT, helped me through this wildly unexpected event.  

And then, the Friday before Christmas,  my husband David Dae An Rynick, Roshi,  was in a car accident in New Jersey during a powerful storm, as he was traveling from Pennsylvania where he had been visiting his mother.  He has a fractured sternum and some bruises, and our car was totaled.  We managed to get him home that night and I'm glad he’s alive!  

Following that, on Christmas day, my brother Stephen died unexpectedly.  David and I are both grieving and healing, emotionally and physically.  I have slowly returned to teaching,  supported by the Dharma Holders and Senior Assistant Teachers of Boundless Way Zen who have stepped in to offer talks and dokusan.  We are so grateful to everyone in the sangha who has reached out to us by phone, email, and text.  A number of people have offered the use of their car, offered to shop, sent flowers, bought groceries, and made and delivered meals.  We truly feel that we are surrounded by love and compassion.  

And this weekend I taught a sesshin on Zoom with David going in and out as he was able,  partnered with Dharma Holder Alan Richardson and assisted by Dharma Holder Michael Herzog.  

I am truly grateful for my good fortune that has given us the opportunity to heal and receive from friends, family and our amazing Zen community.

snow

photo by Michael Herzog, sculpture by David Rynick

Blue Cliff Record Case 42 begins:  "Layman Pang was leaving Yaoshan. Yaoshan ordered ten of his Zen students to see Pang off at the temple gate. Pang pointed to the falling snow in the air and said, 'Beautiful snow-flakes! — they don’t fall on any other place.'"

This is just the beginning of the koan, and is followed by a dialogue between Layman Pang and a Zen student who challenges him.  But before the objecting mind of that student enters the story, we can relish Layman Pang's words by themselves.  

It's snowing in Worcester tonight.  Later, David and I will walk over to the Temple for our Sunday night service, through the darkness, through the falling snow.  It's not a big storm, and the whiteness spreading everywhere is so lovely.  Layman Pang, a Zen ancestor who never ordained and who is revered for both his ordinariness and his deep insight,  must have enjoyed a similar scene as he was ending his visit at the teacher Yaoshan's place.   Sometimes his additional comment is translated as "they don't fall anywhere."  But I like this translation -- there's nowhere else they can be.  There's nothing else that could be happening right now.  

Whether your present moment experience is lovely or painful, sweet or challenging, can you see this truth for yourself?  There is no other life than the one we are living.  And in a moment, there will be some other life.  Our way of practice keeps pointing us to this, this, this.  Nowhere else.  The mind that wants good things to last and bad things to stop has a hard time sinking into the reality of this.  Pause and feel it for yourself.  "Beautiful snowflakes!  -- they don't fall on any other place."

The Snake's Tail Sesshin

 We had our annual Rōhatsu sesshin this past weekend, celebrating the day 2600 years ago that our founding teacher, Shakyamūni Buddha, had his great awakening to the true nature of reality.  We worked with kōan 6 from the Gateless Gate collection, where the Buddha twirls a flower and his first Dharma heir, Mahakashyapa, smiles and is recognized as understanding the great matter of our Way.  it was the first sesshin taught by Dharma Holder Michael Herzog, who assisted David Rynick Rōshi and myself, and the head seat (tanto) was Assistant Teacher Adam Monty, with Senior Assistant Teacher Rev. Paul Galvin supporting him as assistant tanto, and Assistant Teacher Rev. Corwyn Miyagishima supporting our zoom sangha as online tanto.  We had 40 participants, 22 in person at the Temple, and 18 in the zoom zendo.   The name given to the sesshin by Adam is based on the poem by Wumen that accompanies the koan, where, describing the Buddha, he writes, "The snake shows his tail."  The whole is revealed with one glimpse of the part.  And so it is with awakening.  The weekend was a wondrous experience of deep practice and community connection.

Wandering and Wondering Fall 2022 Sesshin

 This past weekend we celebrated the arrival of fall and Indigenous People's Day with a three day hybrid sesshin -- around 20 people participated online on zoom, and 20 people were in residence at the Temple.  We explored a koan case from the Blue Cliff Record, in which Zen master Changsha goes off wandering in the mountains.  

We are finding ways to continue to deepen and widen our Temple residential practice, while including people from around the country and the world, through zoom.  We are truly blessed that the strength of the Dharma has supported our sangha practice.  Come wander and wonder with us:  Boundless Way Zen Temple