From Thomas Yuho Kirchner's translation of Case 11 in Entangling Vines (also Case 12 in the Gateless Gate:)
Every day Ruiyan Shiyan would call to himself, "Master!"
"Yes!" he would answer himself.
"Be wide awake!" he would say.
"Yes!"
"Whatever the time, whatever the day, never be misled by others!"
"Yes! Yes!"
|
mural, Long Beach, CA |
The second to last line of this koan is often translated as "Don't be fooled!" Not much is known of the historical Ruiyan, but from the evidence of this dialogue I've always liked him a lot. I imagine him waking up in the morning and calling out to himself, having this little private conversation. Ruiyan's humility and humor feels like the most accurate reflection of the Zen approach to life, at least, as I understand and practice it myself. In this view there is no permanent state of enlightenment, no fantasy of perfection that is so much a part of the popular understanding of the fruits of meditation these days. I just was referred to a website of someone who claims this kind of perfection -- once the great turning of the heart happens, you're all set for life. Always open, always awake. But my experience is different -- a continual opening and closing, like Rumi's hand in the poem "Birdwings." We need constant reminders to not slip back into the dualistic greed that Chogyam Trungpa called "Spiritual materialism." A life in Zen is not about attaining something. It's about waking up to the full life of being human that is our birthright, but that is obscured by our thoughts and desires and resistance to what is right in front of us all the time. Our little discursive brains think that enlightenment looks like something else. It's hard for it to believe that it looks just like this!
Your grief for what you’ve lost lifts a mirror
up to where you are bravely working.
Expecting the worst, you look, and instead,
here’s the joyful face you’ve been wanting to see.
Your hand opens and closes and opens and closes.
If it were always a fist or always stretched open,
you would be paralyzed.
Your deepest presence is in every small contracting and expanding,
the two as beautifully balanced and coordinated
as birdwings.
From The Essential Rumi Coleman Barks with John Moyne
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